January 31, 2024
Deadline: Ended
Winner
Michael Metzler
"Yeah… but she MIGHT show up."
Previous Contests
All captions, once submitted, become exclusive property of Meskimen Applied Silliness, Inc.
All Images Copyright Meskimen Applied Silliness, Inc. All Rights Reserved.
A young New York City boy’s dream of a western shave and a haircut
Gotta big date with a gila monster!
1) Pete: “You and I are the last two people on Earth after the Apocalypse. Why do keep insisting on a shave every morning?”
John: “Because you never know when the aliens might return. I want us to look civilized”. Pete: “Oh, right. That makes complete sense!”
3) “I’m so excited, today is the day the aliens are returning. I want to look my best when we’re completely annihilated!”
5) “I know you’re on the run from the law Jesse James, but this is ridiculous!”
6) “Ha! The Indians won’t find us out here!”
7) “Ha! The Zombies won ‘t find us out here!”
7) “I said I wanted some privacy for my shave, but this is ridiculous!”
8) “Sweeney Todd, Sweeney Todd, why does that name sound so familiar?”
9) “Sweeney Todd, Sweeney Todd, why does that name sound so familiar?. Oh well, let’s get cuttin’!”
10) “I still can’t believe that you and I are the last two people alive following the Apocalypse. What are the odds? Ha!
By the way, what did you say your name was…Sweeney Todd?”
11) “When I paid to come to WESTWORLD, this isn’t exactly what I had in Mind!”
12) “When I paid to come to WESTWORLD, this isn’t exactly what I had in Mind. The brochure said there’d be dancing girls!”
13) “Wow the teleportation device works great! Tomorrow I want a shave in Antartica!”
14) “Wow, when you said you have very exclusive clientele, I had no idea!”
15) “Can you turn on the air? It’s getting a little hot in here!”
So glad you happened by!
“Let’s make this a quick shave. I see buzzards circling.”
Welcome to the Wild West Salon! I have skills sharper than a cactus needle and I can even make a desert mirage look sharp!
I’d walk a mile for a camel, but since I don’t smoke, I’ll take a haircut, and a shave!
Hey Joe, for a one chair barbershop, you have quite the ambience
I always come to the desert to do my combo shave and colonoscopy special.
“What time is your appointment with the Lone Ranger?”
Welcome to our distraction-free shaving service.
Sorry about the sand in the hot towel.
We call this the ‘true grit’ shave.
Yes, we got a great deal on this land. Why do you ask?
I dreamt last night that there used to be a whole town here. Silly me.
After days of looking for water, what Hezekiah found was oh, so much better.
“So tell me, how did the Great Basin Desert get its name?”
“Yes, and it doubles as a tanning salon!”
Not all mirages are created equal, eh?
They were right. You were worth the crawl.
Another barren desert…
So I’m dead? Cool. Leave the sideburns.
He was in the desert and hungry, so he ate the sand which is there. Get it?
So how’s business since moving from the city?
No, never saw the musical Sweeney Todd, why?
Close your eyes…So with this yoga position we are going to imagine ourselves in the middle of a vast space, doing something that brings us special confort.
I can’t feel my face when I’m with you… but I love it.
” Like shaving a cactus”
Yes, dry sauna and shave please.
“So this is what they mean by dry shave “
Don’t look…but…I feel as though we are being watched.
No, no problem in finding you at all….they said you were just outside of Salt Flat and that if I got to El Paso I had gone too far.
Just curious, Sweeney Todd — why Death Valley?
Great location… not a lot of competition!!
Got a date with a pretty girl next territory over! By the time I get there I should have a nice 5 o’clock stubble.
Yeah… but she MIGHT show up.
I’ve never seen you before. You must not be from around here.
I traveled a little farther than I usually would but you have great Google reviews.
“These millionaire survival courses get tougher every year.”
Thanks, Pete. It was just too noisy back there.
are those succulents new?
oh and watch out for those pricks on the way out
I swear those cacti getting closer!
normally I don’t take walk ins, but…
hey my grandfather used to say
open a good barbershop
and a town will grow around it
really? NO gossip?
ohhh yeahhh…
that gummy’s definitely kickin’ in
but after the wall didn’t happen
I decided to stay anyway
hey is there a nice lunch place around here?
so how bout those diamondbacks, eh?
I got the idea when HR merged with AI
yeah I was working in HR
and then left to work in AI
that’s when it struck me…
hey why not do HAIR!
well I guess I know
how you got your dry wit
well it all started when
my grandfather was rod serling’s barber
this IS my dream job
I can’t believe I’m having this dream again
nope, this is my first time having this dream
I like this dream way more than the one
where I’m naked at a school assembly
…so when the roadside fruit stand went under
I figured I’d try this
glad you could fit me in
oh sure this is nice…
but someday I hope to have a salon
…oh do you validate?
well your sign worked — next shave 300 miles
did you have any trouble finding me?
yeah but it’s a dry heat
no you’re not boring me
that was an actual tumbleweed
what you need is an espresso machine!
I wanted something quieter after that strip mall